Documenting my journey through the mental health system

Score one for independent cinema – Damien Leone’s Terrifier 3 is the top movie in the US right now. Art the Clown got no marketing, a small budget, and still beat Hollywood juggernaut Joker in its opening weekend, earning over 18 million at the box office compared to Joker’s 7 million.

There were three walkouts when I saw it in the theater on Saturday. They had set up a large puke bucket toward the front. The Terrifier movies are gorefest delights, dedicated to practical effects, and each one upping the ante on the previous one. And the latest installment had an opening scene so gruesome and hilarious that 11 people walked out of the premiere and one was physically sick. Several countries have since banned the film, only increasing the intrigue.

I’ve always been into horror, the macabre, the disturbing, and the frightening. I fell in love with clowns after reading Steven King’s It at 12 years old. I watched Child’s Play at four years old when it came out in 1989. Not sure where my parents were. I’m a huge fan of all the horror classics and slashers. Art the Clown will go down as the latest in a grand pantheon of iconic horror movie villains. If I have a costume this Halloween, it will be as Art the Clown.

Halloween is the closest thing I have to religion. Last year, before ending up inpatient at the VA psych ward, I didn’t participate in any Halloween decorating or activities at all. A clear and obvious sign I was fucked up. This year I want to make up for lost time and watch all the scary movies I can and actually get dressed up and go out somewhere. I don’t exactly know what my plans are, I just don’t want to miss out on this year like I did last year.

I think a lot of people might be as fascinated as I am of the macabre, and horrifying things. Halloween is a major world holiday, after all. An entire day dedicated to the dead. On All Hallow’s Eve, I light candles at the witching hour and remember the dead walk the earth. The masks and costumes allow you to blend in with them. I find it so interesting, from a psychological perspective, that humans are so fascinated with death and scary things and are in fact drawn to those things. How interesting that an NC-17 gruesome gory slasher is the number one movie in the US.

Terrifier 4 has been confirmed as the final installment in the franchise.